To Hit Back or Not ???

Saturday, at a friendly gathering of friends and family, three children caused each other to cry.  I went to be the peace-maker.  When I learned the truth of the scuffle and encouraged one not to hit back at the other, the 5 yr old said "but my Daddy tells me to hit back"...  "Really ?" I said ....   Then encouraging them to have fun and no one hit each other I returned to the adults.  Later, I began a dialogue with my husband and a dear friend, asking "do you believe in hitting back?".  It seems to be a theme in my life.  As upper management at a business, last week I counselled several persons on taking the high road, letting some things roll off, not holding onto resentment and thinking about where the other person is coming from rather than "getting back at someone i.e hitting back..."     Forgive me if I am a peace-activist...  But I just don't remember Jesus saying "hit back".  Of course that is why we have wars because we have not transcended this.  Surely a beginning is with 5 year olds in our living rooms ?